Some days I am really amazed at how much I can accomplish in my waking hours. Working in a school means that it doesn’t matter what you planned; it can all change when a student walks in with a question or in crisis. This is one of the busiest times of year as kids are melting down and exhausted. As counselors, we try to stay on top of our struggling students but it can be challenging given the sheer volume we each have on our caseloads.

But it makes sense. The sun is barely out anymore. The end of daylight savings throws everyone off. And teachers are tired too. Parents start to show up all of a sudden showing an interest in their child’s performance and expecting them to use the break to get caught up. Yes, there is physically time given to students to make up work but it is also called a break for a reason. Students and staff alike to need to regroup and recharge for the final push until the end of the semester. It’s amazing how quickly it goes by.

Outside of school, I see clients twice a week and on Saturday mornings. Most people tell me I’m crazy but I have always had 2+ streams of income. I was taught early in life to have a back-up plan. Having my LPC is my back up plan. And seeing clients is my extra/vaca/goal money. It’s hard to live on an educator salary sometimes so this gives me a little boost without having to tend bar anymore and be up until the wee hours of the morning. I’m still working 2 jobs but I’m much more rested and sane this way. And my body doesn’t ache. I miss the cash but the consistent extra paycheck quickly helps me get over it.

As a therapist, self care is something I discuss often with my clients and students. But the actual practice of it can be challenging. When can I fit it into my schedule? How much will it cost? Does it even work? It takes some concerted effort to make self care a reality consistently.

I read in a book (the title escapes me) that walking in nature and taking a bath are two of the most effective strategies to reduce stress. I always loved taking baths as a kid. I would be in there for hours. Now, I try to soak at least 2 times per week. At times I wonder if a hot tub would be more efficient, but that will have to wait until a different phase of life when I have a sturdier deck or yard to withstand the weight of the water.

The relaxing nature of being submerged in warm water seems to melt the stress of the day away. Add in some epsom salts or essential oils and your body and mind are able to take a short holiday from the to-do lists. Include a bath pillow to rest against with some relaxing music and maybe some wine, and you have, in my mind, the perfect way to end a day.

Today the counselors went into the classroom to have the 10th grade students take a personality inventory and start reflecting on potential careers that may be a good fit in the future for their personality type. It’s astounding how these adolescents believe they know more than a highly used, viable assessment created for this purpose. It’s difficult to remember back to my high school days but I’m sure I felt the same way. There are parts of me that want to shake their naive little shoulders to make them pay attention to avoid the pitfalls and struggles that could be avoided.

However, it is in those struggles that our true character comes to light. There is always the option to give up or switch paths. Or there are those experiences that bring about other lessons and people into our world that we would have otherwise missed had we skipped that part of our lives. As adults, we don’t always take the time to reflect on how we have become who we have. If only we spent more time appreciating our past to propel us forward with confidence to the next chapter in our story.

Have you ever thought about what life would be like if there was no one else to compare yourself too? How freeing would that feel? As I start my 42nd year of life, I realize that at times I play by my own rules and do what I want regardless of what others think. And at other times, I get stuck in my head trying to please others or live up to the societal norm. As I contemplate how to live my life unfettered from societal norms, I thought I would share my thoughts, feelings and research in case any one else is also feeling like they want to explore living their life to the utmost.

As an example of bucking traditional norms, I am sitting with my pup at a remote location in Utah overlooking the Colorado river and a beautiful landscape. It took 4-Wheel drive and a lot of swear words to get here, but I did it. Alone. I tend to take trips or make decisions that other people say are crazy, mainly because I do them alone. My philosophy is that if I have to wait to do things in life with another person, my life would be pretty boring and unfulfilling.

I’m not sure if anyone else will find and read what I have to say. However, I hope it finds those that need a little encouragement and proof that you can do whatever you want to do in life, regardless of what others say. Enjoy!