I used to LOVE Christmas as a kid. My mom is one of 7 and dad is one of 5 so even though it was just my brother and I with a nine year age gap, Christmas was always full of family and excitement. My cousins and I would unwrap our gifts first and then run off to play while the adults did whatever they did.

As I have grown older, I have rarely been in a relationship over the holidays. And with no children of my own and no nieces or nephews, the magic has fizzled. Our family doesn’t exchange gifts and the only difference is a large meal in the middle of the day. We even stopped going to mass on Christmas because the incense made the whole family’s eyes water and noses run.

With new traditions and reestablishing the reason for the season, I hope to reset my holiday expectations. It’s going to be a challenge to not compare my current situation to my younger years, to the traditions of my friends or to what I thought my life would look like at 42. But I really want to shift my perspective. I’m healthy. I enjoy my life. And I have so much to be grateful for. That is my view of having a true holiday spirit.